DAY 43

I walked along the banks of the river despair.
When I looked at my reflection in the murky dark waters,
I saw a distortion of the truth.
I could have built a house
& resided there for the rest of my days,
Awaiting the sweet release of death but,
I decided to move on.

Along my journey I encountered another
Who told me she had heard of the river life
& was on a quest to find it.
It has been said that this river has miraculous power
& once tasted will open up a universe of truth & light.

My heart began to stir deep within my soul.
This feeling was new to me
& I found myself wanting more, needing more.
So I decided to set off toward the East,
Awaiting the sunrise each morning
To help me stay the course.

Not conscious of my surrounds,
I walked for years,
Keeping my eyes on the horizon.
One day I stubbed my toe on a rock,
The pain was so intense
That I found I needed to rest.

While in repose a glimmer caught my eye.
I looked at the source
& beheld the clearest, bluest blue sparkling water my eyes had ever seen.
I crawled to the rivers edge
& upon approach saw a reflection of the truth.

I suddenly became aware
Of a thirst that was as dry
As the desert wind.
All I could do to quench it
Was to dive into the clear blue water
& drink till the river was dry.

I became frightened.
What had I done?
What would we do without the river life?
What happened next was nothing short of a miracle!
Water began to rise from the river bed,
More pure than it had been before.

You see, the more you drink from the river life
the more clear your life & truth become.

by Kleoniki Vanos

Happy life journey toward your truth!

DAY 42

If by chance we should meet
and upon meeting you find the need to change me,
turn around & walk away!

The Look of Love
by Kleoniki Vanos

 

For if you stay & so succeed
you will find the original to be tainted
& just another version of you,
thus no more will I be.

Purity
by Kleoniki Vanos

So, leave if that be your design
that you & I may go
free to be.

Watching the Moment
by Kleoniki Vanos

Because, you see, you do not like yourself
& therefor you will not like me!

 

Reclining
by Kleoniki Vanos

You are too different to live
& too precious to die!

DAY 41

The question I have most often asked myself is, "Who am I?"

The answer has come in varying degrees, and one such answer incubated for about 10 years...

I AM THE TREE OF LOVE AND LIFE!

Lavender Dreams
by Kleoniki Vanos
The first Jupiter of my dreams drew me into a deep meditation of love and wisdom.

The reply that returns to you will be determined by whether you are willing to let go of the limited belief system to which you have attached your identity.

Consider the following as a guideline to the response of your own question:


I am part of the tree of love & life...

I am made of the earth...

I am the sky...

I am a seed...

I am life!

I am the wind & the rain...

I am summer, autumn, winter, spring...

I am on my journey...

Keep on Keeping on
by Kleoniki Vanos
Meditate on joy and love, for they are infectious, and will fuel the soul, mind, and body for your journey.

I am the journey...

Unkonw Destination
by Kleoniki Vanos
Loose the limited space which was formed by your past, and you will be liberated to create an unlimited  journey.

I am company & solitude...

I am joy & pain...

I am love!

I am brave & I am afraid...

I am nourishment...

I am wine that intoxicates & opens the doors of truth...

I am music & dance with my eyes wide shut...

I am here, I am everywhere...

I am a giver of life...

I am taking all that I need & sharing all that I can give...

I am life!

Planetary Motion I
by Kleoniki Vanos

I am light...

I am a mystery...

I am a treasure lost & found...

I am a queen & a mortal...

I am the sun, the moon & the stars...

I am the beginning & the end of myself...

I am more...

I am new & I am old...

Paying Homage II
by Kleoniki Vanos
To place yourself at the mercy of others will come to no good end. Give yourself mercy and let the old self go,  for the deep self, the naked self is the powerful wanderer.

(this is hard to say but,) I am pain & I am love...

I am a friend & an enemy...

I am a lie & a truth...

I am a builder & a bulldozer...

I exhort & admonish...

Lost Voice
by Kleoniki Vanos

I am silent & I speak...

I am a creator...

I am a seeker...

Multiple Wounds
by Kleoniki Vanos

I am wounded & I am healed...

I bring wounds & healing...

Dive Into
by Kleoniki Vanos
"Your daily life is your temple and your religion. Whenever you enter into it take with you your all." Gibran.

I AM!

DAY 40

A world of colour

Colours can have an affect on the way you feel.
Consciousness breeds awareness and being aware can help you better understand yourself, your environment, and others.

Tree of Life I
by Kleoniki Vanos

Red
Western - energy, danger, love, passion, warning, anger, action, confidence, courage, vitality.
Isn't it interesting that love and danger fall under the same colour?
Eastern - prosperity, good fortune, joy.
Gold & Yellow
Western - happiness, hope, cowardice, caution, wealth, prosperity,wisdom.
Eastern - sacred, imperial.

Pink
Western - caring, nurturing, love, romance, feminine, beauty.
Eastern - feminine.
Green
Western - lucky, spring, new birth, regeneration, life, nature, fertility, well being.
Eastern - new life, regeneration, fertility, hope.
Blue
Western - trust, authority, conservative, depression, masculing, youth,spirituality, truth, peace.
Eastern - immortality.

Tree of Life II
by Kleoniki Vanos

Brown
Western - down to earth, stable, dependable, wholesome, order, convention.
Eastern - the colour of eath.
Purple
Western -  royalty, spirituality, wealth, fame, magic, mystery.
Eastern -  wealth.
Indigo: intuition, meditation, deep contemplation.

Tree of Life III
by Kleoniki Vanos

Orange
Western - vitality with endurance.
Eastern -  happiness, spirituality.
White
Western - bride, purity, cleanliness, peace, angels.
Eastern - death, sadness, mourning.
Black
Western - power, control, intimidation, death, rebellion.
Eastern - wealth, health, prosperity.

Dance like there's no tomorrow
by Kleoniki Vanos

Grey
Western - humility, dullness, uncertainty, indifference sorrow, security, maturity.
Eastern - maturity, conservatism, old age.

Bronze: strength & durability, resistant to corrosion, easy to cast into shape.

Colour your world with Colour, It is a wonderful way of expression.

DAY 39

Recently I have been asking myself the question: "What am I worthy of?"
I will extend the same question to you: What are you worthy of?
Let us explore the answer together...

by Kleoniki Vanos

I (You) am... worthy of love!
I (You) am... worthy of respect!
I (You) am... worthy of success!
I (You) am... worthy of peace!
I (You) am... worthy of joy!
I (You) am... worthy of following my dreams!
I (You) am... worthy of acceptance!
I (You) am... worthy of expressing my individual thoughts & feelings without criticism!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"You can't even imagine how well we can lie about the state of our own heart."

I (You) am... worthy of the truth!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"To me this is a false diary, though no human being can be so honest as to become completely false."

I (You) am... worthy of protection!
I (You) am... worthy of victory!
I (You) am... worthy of using my words for good!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"I am happy. I am happy. Nobody can deny it. In the first place, there is no evidence."

I (You) am... worthy of happiness!
I (You) am... worthy of dreams!
I (You) am... worthy of feelings!
I (You) am... worthy of passion!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"My recent past is nothing more than meaningless shadow boxing. I must find some infinitesimal sign of love."

I (You) am... worthy to see!
I (You) am... worthy to ask questions!
I (You) am... worthy to use my voice!
I (You) am... worthy of finding happiness in the moment!
I (You) am... worthy of not allowing my past to taint my present!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"I hold the mask with all the power I can muster. In the end my hands are cramped, my shoulders are numb. I call in what must be close to a scream. 'Somebody take over for me quickly!'"

"I am not tired of anything; I am simply frightened."

I (You) am... worthy of making mistakes!
I (You) am... worthy of letting go of the mask!
I (You) am... worthy of letting the walls come down!
I (You) am... worthy to be free!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"It seems to me that at any moment I will find happiness. But not the uncertain unhappiness I had know before."

I (You) am... worthy of my own chosen secrets!
I (You) am... worthy of finding my own destiny!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"A great section of clouds waiting to reflect the glow of morning stand in the heavens, but all they can do at this early hour is to make the sky look menacing."

I (You) am... worthy of highs and lows without guilt or pressure to feel what I am not!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"Insects flying! and the air filled with the droning flight of bees & beetles! and the wind replete with sunlight! and the undersides of swallows turning in the wind!"

I (You) am... worthy to stop and smell the roses!

by Kleoniki Vanos

"A small pleasure in rottenness. Joy in spite. Joy in a little laugh up ones sleeve... some people seem born for no other purpose."

I (You) am... allowed to protect myself from people with selfish and malicious intent!

I (You) am... worthy of wisdom and discernment!

by Kleoniki Vanos

YOU ARE WORTHY OF LOVE!!!

carpe diem

DAY 38

CARPE DIEM!

"Rejoice while you are alive; enjoy the day; live life to the fullest; make the most of what you have. it is later than you think." Horace

Ascension
by Kleoniki Vanos

"Anger cannot be dishonest." Aurelius (thought this was profound, just had to share it).

"It is not death that a man should fear, but he should fear never beginning to live." Aurelius

Moulded I
by Kleoniki Vanos

"Begin at the beginning & go on till you come to the end; then stop." Lewis Carrol

zorba: "Why do the young die? why does anybody die, tell me?"
scholar: "I don't know."
zorba: "What's the use of all your damn books? If they don't tell you that, what the hell do they tell you?"
scholar: "They tell me about the agony of men who can't answer questions like yours." Kazantzakis

Moulded II
by Kleoniki Vanos

"Keep me from the wisdom that does not weep & the philosophy that does not laugh." Gibran

"Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact. Everything we see is a perspective, not the truth." Marcus Auralius

"Not everything that can be counted counts, & not everything that counts can be counted." Einstein

Brewing
by Kleoniki Vanos

"Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness." Seneca

Vision

DAY 37

today has been waiting for you...

take a deep breath
by kleoniki vanos

do whatever your hands find to do & do it with passion!

rise to the occasion & make it count
by kleoniki vanos

keep your thoughts in check, make sure they don't sell you an option to opt out & settle. you can! you can! you are a success!

two souls meeting in mid-air
by kleoniki vanos

keeping the faith is sometimes all you can do, but do it & wait for the wonderful surprises that each day affords you.

the blues
by kleoniki vanos

allow yourself the freedom to experience life & people - you'll find there is more GOOD than bad. treasures that fear would have stopped you from finding.



mamma africa
by kleoniki vanos

make it your life's mission to find happiness & contentment within yourself.

taking a walk with purpose
by kleoniki vanos

be unyielding in your determination to stay the course, even if met with resistance & criticism from others, & stay true to yourself!

happy day...

DAY 36



Healing Wings
by kleoniki vanos

you were born with wings. you are not meant for crawling, so don't. you have wings. learn to use them (this will take time) & fly!

Elegance
by kleoniki vanos

simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.
let's think about that statement for a while:
-clear out,
-get rid of unnecessary people & things that hinder & cloud the journey of truth toward self.

letting go - when i let go of what i am, i become what i might be.
as wonderful as this sounds, it is probably up there with one of the most difficult things to do for yourself. is where i am just a place of safety, complacency, stagnation, suffocation, death?

letting go of everything - void - blank out - everything that everyone has ever communicated to you pertaining to who you are! only you know who you truly are & what potential is within you.

re-write who you are. re-invent what you are.

What?
by kleoniki vanos

you can never solve a problem on the level on which it was created. einstein.

so where to from here? one step at a time, keep moving forward, going back is not an option & staying where you are is not either!

continue on the journey towards the truth...

Continuum
by kleoniki vanos



DAY 35

in a life time there are moments, seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, years of:
yes & no
dark & light
love & hate
give & take
wrong & right


Encounter Moments
by kleoniki vanos

good & evil
happiness & sadness
joy & grief
gain & loss
silence & noise

Incubation
by kleoniki vanos

peace & war
safety & danger
seen & unseen
knowing & unknowing
breakthrough & walls
finding & loosing

From Here to There
by kleoniki vanos

holding & letting go
birth & death
friends & enemies


Enlightenment
by kleoniki vanos

kindness & aggression
patience & impatience


Heightened
by kleoniki vanos

health & sickness
endurance & giving up

Continuum
by kleoniki vanos

give & take
abundance & lack
satisfaction & hunger

Embalmed Essence of A Woman
by kleoniki vanos

alone & together
empty & full
acceptance & rejection
understood & misunderstood
listening & deaf
passion & lacklustre

celebrating a life time & more...

DAY 34

please excuse my silence, it's been a little hectic, to say the least.
a group of local artists are planning an exhibition to raise funds for orphans in the area. this event will take place tomorrow night, 3 May 2012 at 19h00, Stonehaven on Vaal.
i'm very excited!

i have been reading a book by clarissa pincola estes & these are the gems that i have gleaned from the journey. sharing some thoughts that i have been meditating on over the past 2 months. hoping that you in turn may be enriched.

• if we could realise that the work is to keep doing the work, we would be much more fierce & much more at peace!
• life & sacrifice go together. if you want to create, you have to sacrifice superficiality, some security, & often your desire to be liked, to draw up your most intense insights, your most far reaching visions.
• guard the treasures of your basic natures...
• it is not good to make choices when we are dazed, but we do.
• but, even if it is our own dismal choices that have blown us off course - too far from what we need - hold faith, for within the soul is the homing device. we all can find our way back.
• when not interfered with, the relationship between soul & spirit is one of perfect symmetry; each enriches the other in turn.
• we cannot overlook the fact that there is still much thieving & hamstringing of talents through cultural restriction & punishment of our natural wildish instincts.
• in the face of "too much' we gradually become dry, our hearts become tired, our energies become spare, & a mysterious longing for - we almost never have a name for it other than "a something" - rises up in us more & more.
• NOTHING MAKES THE LIGHT, THE WONDER, THE TREASURE STAND OUT SO WELL AS DARKNESS. night is when we are closer to ourselves, closer to essential ideas & feelings that do not register so much during the daylight hours.
• do not fear 'not knowing.'
• discontent is the secret door to significant & life-giving change.
• long ago the word alone was treated as two words, all one. it was also used as an oracle, as a way of listening to the inner self to solicit advice & guidance otherwise impossible in the din of daily life.

Comfort in the stillness of sound
by kleoniki vanos

To hamstring a horse
by kleoniki vanos

The butterfly spoke
by kleoniki vanos

• focus is composed of sensing, hearing, & following the directions of the soul-voice.
• in fairy tales, when something bad happens it means that something new has to be tried, a new energy has to be introduced, a helper, healer, magic force has to be consulted.
• your worn-out idea or endeavour can shine more brightly if you will take some of it & throw it away. it is the same idea as the sculptor removing more marble in order to reveal more of the hidden form beneath.
• to take a breath causes one to feel ones emotions, that when we wish not to feel we hold our breath instead.
• when laughter helps without doing harm, when laughter lightens, realigns, reorders, reasserts power & strength, this is the laughter that causes health.  when the laughter make people glad they are alive, happy to be here, more conscious of love, heightened with eros, when it lifts their sadness & severs them from anger, that is sacred.
• all emotion, even rage, carries knowledge, insight, what some call enlightenment.
• we want to use anger as a creative force. we want to use it to change, develop, & protect.
• when we are drawn to quests we know little about, this makes life & develops soul.
•  the important part of forgiveness is to begin & continue. the finishing of it all is a life work.
• your life may not have turned out to be a happily ever after, but most certainly there is now a fresh once upon a time waiting for you from this day forward.

Another country
by kleoniki vanos



• for the sake of your wild soul, it is better to cry.

Mannequin
by kleoniki vanos






till we meet again...